wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
