is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
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