Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
