not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
