Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
The convent might be a nice break from real life
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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