I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
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