How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Sober January is a disaster.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Randomize
