if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I wish i was in the wii world.
We got so high we made milksteak
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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