I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
