are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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