at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
