It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
