I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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