Who did Billy Mays play for?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
