my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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