Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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