handjob tips. give me some.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Of course I have a pirate flag
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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