I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
