I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
