there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
