weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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