I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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