I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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