You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
