So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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