dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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