Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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