Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize