So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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