First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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