I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize