Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
