And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
why is half of my head shaved?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
