he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize