Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
