let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
