**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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