Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
