i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Randomize
