My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
