my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Never joke about your clitoris.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
