Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
