the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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