Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
