what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
