Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
