i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Dicks are not precious.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
