he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
worst night to have a conscience
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
