what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
