I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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