i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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