No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Randomize
