Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
